Lindsay Perigo
Lindsay Perigo

The Politically Incorrect Show - 03/05/2000

[Music - Die Fledermaus]

Good afternoon, KAYA ORAAAA & welcome to the Politically Incorrect Show on the free speech network, Radio Pacific, for Wednesday May 3, proudly sponsored by Neanderton Nicotine Ltd, the show that says bugger the politicians & bureaucrats & all the other bossyboot busybodies who try to run our lives with our money; that stands tall for free enterprise, achievement, profit & excellence against the state-worshippers in our midst; that stands above all for the most sacred thing in the universe, the liberty of the human individual.

[Music up, music down]

Mindless Marxist thugs went on the rampage in various parts of the world yesterday as part of a May Day protest against capitalism. Similarly bedraggled, dissolute entities staged a similar protest in Helengrad on Monday, outside a McDonald's outlet, McDonald's having become an international symbol of everything these latter-day fascists & communists dislike - they would far rather ban private enterprise in food, of course, & have only government-owned, union-run food chains where one would have to queue interminably for government-prepared muesli & tofu. No animal products, no sugar, no coffee - & NO SMOKING while you waited!

Yesterday, I received this e-mail:

"Dear Mr Perigo ( Or so it says on your eftpos card !)....sorry about that!

"I was a little surprised to listen to your show yesterday (1st May) without any callers wishing to discuss the consequences of May the first.

"I was further disinherited to see on the scoop web site the protests of various anarchists outside a Wellington McDonalds. Evidently McDonalds signifies all the evils of capitalism to these morons.

"Recently I was introduced to a different side of the McDonalds Corporation; that of McDonalds commitment to training and upskilling of their staff.

"Our small company recently advertised for a new staff member in a relatively senior position. We soon learnt of a possible candidate who had the right sort of qualifications but only 4 years experience.

"However upon interviewing her I quickly learnt of her work experience including an extended period with McDonalds. She told me of how she started working in the kitchens at McDonalds part time, progressing to counter sales and then a managerial role. Her final duties with McDonalds, while still studying at University, involved opening a new restaurant; I think a fair reflection of her expertise, attitude and commitment, part of which she no doubt gained while working under the guidance of golden arches.

"This wonderful person has now joined our company. She drives a better car than me, and her starting salary puts her into the so called "Cullen greed tax bracket." I am sure that her commitment to looking after our customers will only be matched by her self esteem and confidence.

"Based on her efforts in the short time she has been with us I can only conclude that if McDonalds is the icon of Capitalism then bring on the cheese burgers!"

Oh yes! Actually, make mine a Big Mac, only without those ghastly gherkins. And without the lettuce & the rest of that healthy muck. AND - a glass or four of pinot noir to wash it down. Yes, I know McDonald's aren't licensed, but hey, there's a thought! Let's quaff a toast to McDonald's, to Wendy's, to KFC, to Starbucks - & while we're about it, to Henry Ford, to Thomas Edison, to Bill Gates, to every capitalist enterprise everywhere, big or small, lifting us out of the gutter & bringing us the good things of life, notwithstanding the Neanderthal Marxist brutes who want to drag everyone down to their own level of squalor-&-misery-worship.

To capitalism!

[Play FreeRad Award]

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