Lindsay Perigo
Lindsay Perigo

The Politically Incorrect Show - 07/09/2000

[Music - Die Fledermaus]

Good afternoon, KAYA ORAAAA & welcome to the Politically Incorrect Show on the free speech network, Radio Pacific, for Thursday September 7, proudly sponsored by Neanderton Nicotine Ltd, the show that says bugger the politicians & bureaucrats & all the other bossyboot busybodies who try to run our lives with our money; that stands tall for free enterprise, achievement, profit & excellence against the state-worshippers in our midst; that stands above all for the most sacred thing in the universe, the liberty of the human individual.

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There's a talkshow host in the United States, Dr Laura Schlessinger, who is notorious. She is a convert to Judaism & expresses hardline, Old Testament views on matters like homosexuality which have led her to fall foul of Politically Correct, anti-hate crime laws. From what I've heard about her, there's not much she & I would agree on, though of course I would defend to the death her right to air her opinions. In any event, a listener has posted an open letter to her on the internet, which is, I think, of universal relevance:

"Dear Dr Laura,

"Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, & I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the laws & how to follow them.

"a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

"b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day & age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

"c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15: 19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

"d) Lev. 25;44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male & female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend claims this applies to Mexicans but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

"e) I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states that he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

"f) A friend feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 11.10) it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

"g) Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

"h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

"i) I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

"j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread. He also tends to curse & blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary to get the whole town together to stone them? Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws (Lev. 20:14)?

"I know that you have studied these things extensively, so am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal & unchanging."

From Dr Laura there has, as yet, been no response.

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