Lindsay Perigo
Lindsay Perigo

The Politically Incorrect Show - 17/04/2001

[Music - Die Fledermaus]

Good afternoon, Kaya Oraaa & welcome to the Politically Incorrect Show on the free speech network, Radio Pacific, for Tuesday April 17, proudly sponsored by Neanderton Nicotine Ltd., the show that says bugger the politicians & bureaucrats & all the other bossyboot busybodies who try to run our lives with our money; that stands tall for free enterprise, achievement, profit, & excellence, against the state-worshippers in our midst; that stands above all for the most sacred thing in the universe, the liberty of the human individual.

[Music up, music down!]

Well, the hostages are home & the soul-searching is in top gear. The price President Bush had to pay was to grovel before the world's number one totalitarian state. I cannot believe that the United States does not have the wherewithal to conduct lightning rescue raids in situations like this. If such an operation were not feasible, an alternative would have been to accede to the tyrants' demands, secure the hostages' release - & then renege on the deal. One does not owe the truth, or respect, to tyrants. Reneging on the deal in this instance would mean retracting the apology & telling China where to get off. It would mean a statement along the following lines, now doing the rounds, unattributed, on the internet:

Dear China,

We're sorry that you don't train your fighter pilots better. As a token of our apology, here's a copy of Microsoft Flight Simulator 2000.

We're sorry that your front-line fighter planes can't outmaneuver a 35-year-old prop-driven airliner. Perhaps you'd like to consider purchasing some surplus 1950s-era Lockheed Starfighters from Taiwan (who just replaced all theirs with shiny new F-16s).

We're sorry that you believe your territorial waters extend all the way to Australia. For future reference, here's an American 6th grade geography textbook. (Please take note of the Copyright information printed inside the cover.)

We're sorry that you can't seem to see your part in this incident. We know that it may seem easier to blame others than to take responsibility. Consider this while we build several new Aegis destroyers for our friends in the Republic of China (Taiwan).

We're especially sorry for treating you with such respect for the last 20 years. We'll definitely rethink this policy, and will probably go back to treating you like a common, untrustworthy street gang very soon.

We're very sorry for ever granting you Most-Favored-Nation trading status. This will be rectified at the soonest possible opportunity.


The United States of America

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